Jen Shillingford and Katie Merrill, courtesy of Bryn Mawr College Athletics

On January 30, 2011, one of our writers, Ellen Staurowsky, wrote an entry entitled Leading With Personality: Notes from the Centennial Conference Snell-Shillingford Symposium

The symposium took place at Haverford College this past winter and was co-directed by Bryn Mawr’s senior woman administrator and head lacrosse coach. A couple of Bryn Mawr student-athletes attended the symposium where they networked with female coach mentors and learned about Title IX, careers in coaching, etc. Katie Merrill, a volleyball player who graduated from Bryn Mawr this past Saturday, wrote about her experience in an article on the athletics website:

“Prior to attending the Symposium I had already thought of coaching as something I would enjoy doing, but after the symposium, I felt much more informed as to how I can make coaching a part of my life. Most if not all of the stories I heard that weekend gave me the chance to learn about the experiences of other coaches and what they had to do to get where they are and provided great advice for what I can do to one day be in their shoes.”

On Tuesday, May 1^st, I attended the annual Bryn Mawr College Athletics’ banquet where team awards and various other accolades are given to the student-athletes and teams. One of the largest awards is given in honor of Jenepher Shillingford, former Director of Athletics and head field hockey coach at Bryn Mawr. “The Shillingford is presented to a member of the senior class who has demonstrated, throughout her four years: athletic excellence, sportsmanship and leadership.” The award was presented to Katie Merrill by Jen Shillingford herself! Katie’s well-rounded skills and achievements not only embody “The Shillingford,” they are also conducive to coaching. In fact, she is entering a graduate-assistantship position to become a volleyball coach. I don’t know her personally (and only learned these details at the athletics banquet), yet I can’t help but imagine how influential the Snell-Shillingford Symposium must have been in her decision to pursue a career in coaching. I was certainly pleased to hear this news as she was presented the award, and I look forward to seeing how many more coaches the symposium – and those like it – will foster.

Take a few minutes to view the final episode highlighting Cindy Griffin at St. Joseph’s University.  Today she shares with us her views on mentorship and its role in developing women as coaches.

Please pass this link along and share view Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest, or wherever you share with other coaches!

I’ve been waiting for the news that I received this week for over a year.  You see, a year ago the school where I teach launched our iPad Pilot Program.  This program gave participating teachers and students iPads to use in their classrooms to see if teaching with this technology could change the way in which students and teachers learn and approach various aspects of education.  After watching others all year use their iPads for both teaching applications and everyday tasks such as e-mailing and taking photos, I found out that my iPad 3 has now arrived and will be in my hands next week.

Immediately after I heard this news I began to think of all the benefits having an iPad 3 will bring to me in my athletic responsibilities.  No longer will I need to walk to a computer to send an e-mail while I’m out lining a field; no longer will I have to depend on having a clipboard to carry documents to games; no longer will I need a printer to distribute plays to my athletes; no longer will I need to worry about keeping up with papers listing uniform and warm-up numbers, game day checklists, etc.  Besides being freed from laptops, printers, and paper, the iPad will help me to be a better coach.  For instance, I can video my athletes’ tennis serves to help demonstrate what they are doing right and what is going wrong.  I’ve found that showing an athlete a picture or a video can make a huge difference in modifying or correcting a technique.  Additionally, I am excited that I will be able to draw plays for basketball and field hockey using an app that will be easier for my athletes to understand, and I can immediately e-mail them to my team to review and ask questions.  Lastly, I am excited about the challenges that having an iPad will bring to me as a coach.  It will push me to find ways in which I can use this new technology daily in practice.  It will also allow me to find videos and other materials online to share with my athletes to better them in areas such as technique, focus/concentration, mental toughness, etc.

As you can see these are only a few of my initial thoughts, and I’m sure that once I get the iPad in my hands and spend some time with it many more benefits will be discovered.  While I’m sure I will miss my good old clipboard and playbook, I am excited to see what I can do with this new technology.  I also look forward to seeing how my athletes respond to using iPads as well.  Many of them currently use them in their academic classes and have seen great success, so I’m looking forward to seeing this trend continue in athletics as well.  So, to all of you out there, if you have any experience using an iPad or other tablet in coaching please let me know.  I’d love to hear how you use this technology in coaching, and if you are interested I’ll be happy to share my experiences as I learn to use it as well!

photo source

It’s amazing that people admit to being perfectionists. To me, it’s a disorder, not unlike obsessive-compulsive disorder. And like obsessive-compulsive disorder, perfectionism messes you up. It also messes up the people around you, because perfectionists lose perspective as they get more and more mired in details.  –bnet.com

Most sports don’t require perfection from their participants, so where does this idea of being perfect come from and how can we get rid of it?  I was over at bnet.com reading a great article titled, “Perfectionism Is A Disease. Here’s How To Beat It”, when it hit me that many times our athletes are saddled with this problem and need to be freed of it.  So let’s look at how we can help our teams understand that continual improvement, not perfection, is the goal.

**Three ways to combat perfectionism on our teams**

We learn through our mistakes. “If we don’t want anyone to know we make mistakes, which is how perfectionists tend to behave, we are actually hiding our true selves.” As coaches, we’ve got to be sure to create a practice environment conducive to making mistakes.  After all, if they can’t make mistakes in practice, where can they make them?  If they’re going to get better, they’re going to have to test their limits and that will involve making mistakes.  I talk about this very thing in my post, 3 Reasons Why Making Mistakes Is Vital To Your Team’s Success.   I wonder if this is what happens to those “potential” players who never seem to be as good as advertised…

Set your sights on being a hard worker, not perfect. “A lot of times perfectionism is a way to avoid focusing on goals.”  In my post, So You Want To Be An Excellent Coach?, I talk about the theory that it takes about 10,000 hours of deliberate practice to gain expertise in a field.  What that means for our athletes is that they just need to put in the time and be committed to being good.  It means that when they’re willing to work on the skill that is lacking, time and elbow grease will reap rewards.  This perspective takes every excuse away.  There’s no more, “well, Susie is just a better athlete than me”, but rather, “Susie was just willing to work harder than me.”  And that’s not an excuse, that’s just sad.

Create a super teamy team. “Teams do better work when everyone on the team likes everyone else.” Getting along goes a long way to helping people to accept their team roles, creating great team chemistry, and smoothing out the rough edges of a season.  The cornerstones of John Wooden’s Pyramid of Success are hard work and enthusiasm and the other three blocks that make up the base are: friendship, loyalty, and cooperation.  The whole idea of the Pyramid is that the things that helped Wooden’s teams win ten national championships in twelve years are represented on the Pyramid…with the most essential items at the bottom to make up the foundation.  I wrote about it in my post, How Watching Toy Story 3 Can Teach The Essentials Of Teamwork.

Let’s all agree to battle the perfection infestation by creating coaching philosophies and environments that help our athletes get better and challenge themselves.

You can check out more of my writing at www.coachdawnwrites.com.  You can follow me on Twitter @CoachDawnWrites and Facebook so that we can connect and talk coaching.

Chris Nowinski Former Harvard Football Player and WWF Entertainer

Junior Seau’s tragedy put an exclamation point on what I was already thinking as I reflected upon the presentation at the recent American Hockey Coaches Convention. I am speaking about the buzz word in sport right now–CONCUSSIONS.

The Concussion Presentation by Chris Nowinski of the Sports Legacy Institute was informative, interesting, and from a personal perspective it really hit home for me.  My daughter was diagnosed this year with post concussion syndrome.  She is a junior on the Nobles Girls Hockey team; after being diagnosed she could not return to school and had to take a year off to rest her brain and recover from her injury.

Hot off the presses, the May 2012 edition of Sports Illustrated highlights the 40th anniversary of Title IX. I received my copy in the mail yesterday and was excited to see that Title IX was featured on the cover, the center-fold, and had several articles and picture displays throughout this month’s issue (23 pages of coverage to be exact). I was a little concerned when I first saw the cover, because sometimes magazines can be notorious for leaving their cover story on the cover and devoting very little space on the inside for the actual article contents–but it looks as though the magnitude of Title IX didn’t allow that to happen this time around. It’s not only in print, as the online material is just as extensive and all articles are showcased in full, although I would highly recommend picking up a hard-copy (maybe it will be worth something when the 100th anniversary rolls around). SI’s Title IX at 40 coverage has acknowledged that there is still a struggle for gender equity. In order to touch upon this angle, but also recognize how far Title IX has come and the path it has forged to be where it is today, the stories and graphics in this edition thread a theme of focusing on the past, the present, and looking into the future.

SI’s lead-in story for this Title IX edition is entitled, The Power of Play, by Kelli Anderson. Here, a brief history of Title IX is provided as a vehicle to set the stage for the reader and  introduce the other 9 stories in the series that “reflect the spirit of Title IX”. In this short opening the progress of Title IX  is made very apparent through narrative description and by the numbers, “While the effect on opportunities in education has been profound—the number of law and medical degrees going to women has jumped from 7% and 9%, respectively, in 1972 to 47% and 48% in 2010—the athletic gains have been seismic. According to a report provided by the Women’s Sports Foundation, 294,015 girls competed in high schools four decades ago. By last year the number had ballooned to 3,173,549, and it’s growing”. However, it is also noted that there isn’t room to sit back and rest on laurels, “…Many coaching jobs that once went to women are now claimed by men”. ‘Tis true, but we’re working on changing that!

Here are the additional 9 stories included in the Title IX edition, check them out!:

• The 1996 Olympics, by Kelli Anderson
• Yale Rowers: Naked Power, by Michael Bamberger
• Maria Pepe: Let’s Just Play Ball. by Melissa Segura
• The Title IX Babies: Spirits of ’72, by Phil Taylor
• Political Football: Winning at Political Football, by Alexander Wolff
• Battle of the Sexes: When Billie Beat Bobby, by L. Jon Wertheim
• The AIAW: Chance to be a Champion, by George Dohrmann
• Father Figures, by Alexander Wolff
• Sharon Berg: Testing the Waters, by Nancy Ramsey

There is also a neat Title IX timeline that moves along through the pages and surrounds each story: Title IX Timeline

As an aside to the Title IX timeline, don’t miss all the little facts and tid-bits on Title IX posted throughout the 23 page spread!

Source: McDonell, T. (Ed.). (2012, May 07). Title IX: 40 years of change. Sports Illustrated, 44-66. Retrieved from http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/vault/article/home/m/1/index.htm

I will never forget the pin I bought when I was in fourth grade at a fair by my house. It was light blue with big black lettering and read: “Anything Boys Can Do, Girls Can Do Better.”  I couldn’t get the 50 cents out of my pocket quick enough to buy the pin that I swore was made just for me and I proudly stuck it front and center on my denim-washed jean jacket so that everyone would be able to read it and know that I was one of those girls who wasn’t going to be intimidated by boys.  I’ve kept that pin over the years to remind myself that I – a women – can do anything a man can do…and do it better!

Of course today I don’t truly believe that we as women do everything better than men, but I do believe in that spirited mentality a young girl who knew her unique worth as a female. We as women are different in ways that make us better at some things than others and it’s important we take the time to recognize and celebrate these differences that make us better – especially when it comes to leadership and coaching. Far too often I hear women mention the things that actually make us better leaders as weakness or limitations.  We don’t always fully appreciate what we as women can bring to the table, and instead of celebrating and exploiting these differences, we downplay or ignore them.

I recently came across a post by Dan Rockwell, a.k.a The Leadership Freak (http://leadershipfreak.wordpress.com/), that focused on “Where Women Leaders are Better than Men”.   The post was an interesting compilation of input to a question he threw out there to his Facebook followers.  The Leadership Freak asked the “Freaks” (as he calls them) that follow his Facebook page, “What are women leaders better at than men?”

Incidentally, over the past couple months, I have been asking myself that very same question.  As I watched NCAA Tournament for both women’s and men’s basketball this past winter, I found myself paying less attention to the actual game and more attention to the coaches and their ability to lead – especially when the going got tough!  At times, there were noticeable and distinct differences at how the women coaches responded to certain situations (before, during, in-between and after games) when compared to the men.  It’s not to say one way was right and one was wrong, or one way was successful and another unsuccessful, just that while they were alike in some aspects, they were also noticeably different in others.  Maybe it was that little fourth grader inside of me who thought she could do anything better than the boys, but I started to think about women and their innate differences and what makes them great leaders which in turn lead me to think about what qualities women possess that make them better leaders than men (and vice versa).   I reflected back to myself as a young girl so confident that what made her a girl made her better.  I thought to myself, now all these years later as a woman have I continued to fully embrace my innate differences that make me a strong leader?

I think it’s important to note here that in doing this comparison I by no means am trying to stereotype one gender or another, I’m just simply attempting to point out the unique and valuable differences that women possess which make them fantastic leaders and in turn successful coaches.   The Leadership Freak hinted to this notion well in his post by saying: “Generalities and stereotypes that lock people in restrictive boxes belittle everyone. On the other hand, celebrating difference honors individuals and enhances organizations.”  Well said.

So what exactly did those Facebook followers come up with in response to his question?  Below is a list of answers:

1. Knowing when there is no value in fighting.
2. Understanding when someone just has a crummy day.
3. Understanding the pressures that other women leaders face.
4. Organization and multitasking.
5. Compassion.
6. *Empathy.
7. Tenderness.
8. Building consensus, supporting staff, sharing credit, and leading from the middle.
9. Networking.
10. Emotional Intelligence.
11. *Listening
12. *Smiling through the pain.
13. Focusing on details.
14. Mission focus and *tolerance.
15. Transparency.
16. Simplicity.
17. Valuing people for who they are not just what they do.
18. Building relationships that last.
19. Creating an environment where mistakes are not just tolerated but seen as essential to growth.

Note: Items are listed in the order they were posted on Facebook. An asterisk indicates that item was mentioned more than once.

The Leadership Freak used spot #20 on the list in his post to ask his readers: “What can you add, amplify, or illustrate?”  I’d like to ask the same of all the Women in Coaching readers… use the comments section below to add to the list and share your thoughts with us!

Since I like to end each of my posts with a quote, I can’t help but share the slogan I saw on the t-shirt of a young lacrosse player recently during my recruiting travels.  She reminded me of myself at that age with my treasured blue pin I bought at the fair.  Her t-shirt read “Some girls chase boys, I pass them”.  Something tells me that young girl will grow up to be a successful woman leader.

Jennifer Valore, Assistant Women’s Lacrosse Coach, University of Michigan, valore@umich.edu. Follow me on Twitter: jvalore

In Episode 2 of The Real Women of Coaching — Collegiate Edition, we spoke with Cindy Griffin, Head Women’s Basketball Coach, at St. Joseph’s University located in Philadelphia, PA, about balancing her busy coaching schedule with her personal and family life.

Please watch and feel free to share the link. These videos can really make a difference when coaches at all stages of their careers are able to see them. We can identify with Cindy and know that we are not alone! So please do your part and pass this along to coaches and athletes!

Good coaching is good coaching, regardless of athlete gender.

Male and female athletes are much more similar than they are different. There is just as much variability within females and within males, than between males and females. Despite the popular Mars/Venus perspective that females and males are vastly and inherently different, psychological research has not proven this true (see APA keynote from Janet Hyde titled “The Gender Similarity Hypothesis”).

Similarly, despite widespread opinions, anecdotes, quotes from famous coaches (i.e. Anson Dorrance), and popular press “coaching girls” books that are not evidence-based, research in coaching science and sport psychology does not support the idea that coaching males and females is different….

To read the full blog post Click HERE.

photo source

Here is Pet Peeve #249:  players that cry in practice.  You’re probably thinking, “oh Dawn, you’re so heartless, sometimes there’s a good reason for crying…stop being so mean!”  In my mind though, there’s never a reason to put self before team and that’s exactly what crying in practice or a game does.  Now, I’m not talking about tears that are the result of an injury or yay-we-just-won-the-championship tears…those are both acceptable reasons for crying in sports.  I’m talking about the tears that stem from frustration, anger, or just plain lack of knowledge as to how one’s behavior affects others.  Let’s look at why I have such a strong opinion about crying and what you should do when faced with a crier in practice.

4 Reasons Why Tears Aren’t The Answer

1.       It’s selfish. When a player cries in a practice or game, they’re saying that their interests are more important than the team’s…plain and simple.

2.       It’s distracting. When there’s a player that cries, the team and coach have a decision to make:  do we attend to the emotional player or do we get work done here at practice or our game?  That’s not fair!  Their teammates shouldn’t have to debate whether they’re being awful people just because they want to focus on the task at hand.

3.       It shows lack of respect. The crier doesn’t respect the work that the coach has put into practice planning, because we’ve got a time schedule to keep.  They don’t respect their teammate’s focus or desire to get better at practice.  And in turn, if it’s not nipped in the bud, the crier could lose the respect of their coach and teammates.

4.       It shows lack of control. There’s no age that’s too young to start teaching our athletes how to manage their emotions.  After all, isn’t that the beauty of sports?  They’ll learn how to win and lose with grace, how to earn or lose a starting spot, and how to succeed and fail in front of others…it’s great!  It’s also our job as their coaches to teach them how to handle life’s ups and downs without it negatively impacting the lives of others.

So You’ve Got A Crier…Now What?

1.       Explain the points above. If you don’t explain those things, they’ll just think you’re being mean…which could spawn more tears (*sigh*) and an exponentially higher level of frustration for you as their coach.  They need to understand that those four things above are contrary to any sort of team success and because of that, you can’t let it slide.

2.       Acknowledge whatever their situation is. Their boyfriend broke up with them, they failed a huge test, they’re playing at an amazingly awful level…whatever it is, you get it, right?  You understand why they’d want to cry, why they’re frustrated, and why they feel like they can’t handle it anymore.  You get it…you just won’t tolerate it, because you and the team still have work to do.

3.       Remind them that they’ve got a mouth. They’ve got to use their words.  You’re a reasonable human being, right coach?  If they came to you with a legitimate problem or concern, you’d listen and the two of you would work it out together, right?  Let them know that you’ll be there for them…but only when they can behave like an adult.  You love them and care for them, but poor behavior is poor behavior and it’s not to be tolerated.

4.       Give them a break. Sometimes the crier can get themselves together and refocus.  Sometimes they can’t and you might have to give them a break.  But it’s got to be legit…you can’t hold it against them!  You can’t say on one hand: come to me like an adult and I’ll listen and we’ll work it out…and then when the crier tells you the problem, you yell or scream or are just generally pissed.  Maybe you make them finish practice with the understanding that they’re going to be terrible, or maybe you send them home knowing that they’ll be better the next day.

So there you are folks, this is a tough one for a lot of coaches…tears are powerful and disarming.  But stand your ground and turn the situation into a teachable moment.

You can check out more of my writing at www.coachdawnwrites.com.  You can follow me on Twitter @CoachDawnWrites and Facebook so that we can connect and talk coaching.