Cooperative Play and Donald Trump’s THE CELEBRITY APPRENTICE

I have been thinking about writing this ever since I saw the first few episodes of The Apprentice–of course Donald Trump and his comb-over aside, The Apprentice highlighted several tendencies that I have noticed about my gender that makes me sometimes embarrassed to be female–let me explain…

For anyone who has not seen the show, at the start of each season, the teams are split up by gender–men vs. women. Each episode starts with a task assigned to the team by The Don. The team picks a Project Manager who is in charge of executing the task. As I watched the first few episodes, I noticed that when the men came to play, they picked the project manager and found a way to follow him–even if they weren’t quite sure of the outcome. They would try to believe in the leadership and ultimately defer to the Project Manager on the task. Sometimes, they would have their doubts about his methods or be a little annoyed with a weak player on their team, but they appeared to try to see the good of the team and overcome obstacles to achieve the goal. On occasion, the men’s team confronted a negative team member or the occasional lazy individual in the task, which created outward conflict but all in all they pitched in and helped for the good of the task they were to accomplish. The men won 5 of 7 tasks put forth to them.

The women on the other hand picked their leader after sometimes colorful discussion or not and began the task. As they brainstormed on the task with the Project Manager and tried to share ideas, at any hint of controversy the claws came out! No cooperative behavior, they talked behind each other’s back, formed cliques, and undermined each other. This made for great reality TV! These behaviors seemed like the sport not the task to be completed. The women were caddy, and jealous of each other, and they were hard pressed to acknowledge good ideas of others in the group. I wonder why this is…Does it have something to do with each individual woman’s inner self? Are they insecure or have self esteem issues…or is it nature are women wired this way? I am not sure. The show was hard for me to watch at times as the women’s actions were childish, insincere, and mean…

After the task is completed, the next part of the show involves the two teams coming into DT’s Board Room and finding out the results of the task. Much of the board room involves Donald Trump firing the teams up by pitting the players against each other. If a team wins, they are awarded an amount of money to donate to the charity of the winner’s choice. The penalty for the losing team is to have one member of the team FIRED after Donald Trump instigates the drama for the teams in the boardroom.

In the board room, the men’s team defended their leader at all costs, they would say how great he was and even lie and say he did a great job (even if they all knew he didn’t). They would only throw the leader under the bus if they were really pressured. And even then, it was really hard for the men to be disloyal…it seemed to physically pain them! The team cohesion and positive attitude appeared to have an impact on the eventual victorious outcome for the men.

The women were very different. They were individuals in the board room and appeared to have no solidarity. And it isn’t made easy for them by The Don! Donald Trump is an excellent observer of the body language of the players. When someone doesn’t agree with what is said, and they wince or roll their eyes, he picks up on the body language and he calls them on it. When pressed, the women immediately folded and threw each other under the bus viciously, I might add…there is no mercy. They call each other names and look like children on a playground fighting over who gets to win a prize. It is interesting that when they are going to say something negative about each other they explain why first…as if they are justifying their behavior–fascinating. I wonder if their task was life of death how they’d play? Would they cooperate more and give credit where credit is due?

Now I know it is only a game and is made for TV drama but you have to at least acknowledge the differences in genders…I was talking with a friend about this phenomena and he asked me if I thought that the women’s behaviors were actually being exaggerated to make the men look like they were better for more controversial TV viewing instigated by Trump the male chauvenist? Wow, if that were the case I’d be shocked…I think that even if this were true, the women most likely give the show way more material than the men did–the drama, the crying, the two faced and hurtful behavior…these are the issues that the women have on the show. I am not saying that all women act this way or that this isn’t all made for TV reality, it makes you think though if these exaggerated traits are a tiny bit true and what they say about us as females.

So what does this mean for sports, and how do we tie this in? I say that this is definitely a phenomena that is coming to fruition in the women’s athletic world. As I speak to coaches, both men and women say the behavior of women can at times be non team like and disloyal. Coaches have told me stories of putting themselves out there for their female athletes. Supporting and mentoring the athletes, helping them get better, coming to their rescue to an academic crisis…and at the drop of a hat when the chips are down and a player is struggling on the team and may be relegated from starting position to a non starter because of poor performance, the player throws the coach under the bus. Many women on teams make excuses for losing and then players lack the ability to take responsibility. It is the coach’s fault or a team mate who did not pass to them. Or the players lifted weights or trained too hard two days before and their legs were tired…the women athletes sometimes lack accountability.

Athletic directors have shared their thoughts with me about surveys that are instituted by the NCAA. They are mandatory and each athletic department uses the information differently. Why is it that women feel the need in the surveys to treat their female coaches differently? The women are harder on the women coaches, they throw them under the bus even in winning seasons? Why is it that we cannot compliment good performance when it is woman to woman? I’m not sure, but if I were to guess it is just how we are wired…The women on the Apprentice exhibit these behaviors too!

My final thought is that if we are to change as a gender, sport is a natural teaching tool that can change behaviors. Coaches need to be willing to have conversations about why women have different attitudes and perspectives than men. Acknowledge that women are different than men and discuss it in the realm of how the behavior impacts women’s sports and teams. Until we have coaches who are willing to discuss the behavior, and take it on as a challenge it will not change. If you are a coach reading this article are you willing to have the conversation and be part of the solution?

This is a series of commentary and solutions for women coaches…the next article will provide a suggested remedy to help guide similar behaviors exhibited by female athletes.